I am the current dissatisfied owner of an x-box 360 elite. If you’re reading this, you probably are too. Why am I dissatisfied? Well… I’m dissatisfied that my x-box is no longer a wonderful piece of technology for reading discs, providing entertainment and relieving stress. Now it’s a giant paperweight. With a fancy “X” on it. Sitting on my living room floor and waiting for me to decide his fate.

The first step, of course, is figuring out what this hideous red mark means.

So. Lay your x-box on its side. This is the proper orientation to identify the red ring of death. Its power button has a circle around it that is divided into four quadrants. For the sake of simplicity, let’s label them. The top left is quadrant one, the top right is quadrant two, the bottom left is quadrant three, and the bottom right is quadrant four. I understand? Good. Press the power button.

Now what do you see?

1. Green lights on any or all quadrants – This means that your Xbox is working properly. Put a drive in and see if it has randomly started working again. Stranger things have happened. But most likely, the disk will cause the flashy red lights to reappear.

two. Quadrant 4 flashes red – Hardware failure. I have found very little information on this particular error. It is not as common as the other errors. The Microsoft website says to unplug everything, remove the hard drive, wait a moment, and then plug everything back in. If that doesn’t fix it, the next solution is to send it in for repair.

3. Quadrants 1 and 3 flash red – Your unit has overheated. Leave it alone to cool down. They say five minutes, but do you really want to risk it? Leave it for at least 20 minutes and find a place with better airflow to put your machine.

Four. Quadrants 1, 3 and 4 flash red – General hardware failure. This most likely means that a hardware component has been disabled. This is often caused by cracking of the cold solder on the graphics chip due to the dramatic temperature fluctuations within the machine.

The three flashing lights can also mean that your console is not getting as much power as it should from the power supply. Make sure the supply is fully inserted into the machine. Check that the power supply light is green when the console is on. If it’s red, you may need a new power supply. However, before you run out and buy a new one, try unplugging the power from the wall and from the console. Let it sit for 20 minutes or so and then plug everything back in. If it worked… great! If not, find a new cable. Maybe from someone else who lost their x-box to an eternally red ring of death.

5. All dials flash red – AV cable error. This warning does not actually appear on systems that have an HDMI connection. But if you don’t, and this shows up, double check that your AV cables are fully inserted into each connection.

So… now at least you know what kind of red ring you have. That’s more or less where I am now. Since I have no desire to ship my box and pay $150 to have it fixed, I am looking into my other options.