Unfortunately, most people will face the loss of a loved one in their lifetime. That loss may be through death, divorce, or the destruction of a friendship. Whatever it is, most people will respond to this loss with grievance. Grief is an expression of emotional pain that is specifically associated with feeling extreme pain and sadness. When a person is grieving, they will often experience several different stages of their grief. The seven stages of grief are loose interpretations of the rungs an individual experiences when facing loss. These seven stages are good guidelines for what to expect, however there is a lot of variation between individuals and stages can occur out of order, multiple times, or at the same time as another stage.
The first stage is shock and denial. This stage is defined as when an individual denies the loss of a loved one in an attempt to avoid the pain and suffering associated with the loss. People often have a hard time accepting reality and have trouble determining what really happened.
The second stage is Pain, guilt and fear. With this stage comes a feeling of intense pain along with feelings that life is extremely chaotic or out of control. Guilty thoughts can occur and people can be afraid of their lives ahead. They are afraid that they will not be able to go on with life without the loved one.
The third stage is Anger and bargaining. During this stage questions such as “why me?” or “what did Yo do to deserve this?” This is a period of intense anger and hatred where emotional outbursts, blame, and bitterness often occur. Other valued relationships may possibly be destroyed as a result. An individual will begin to attempt to bargain with God in hopes of alleviating their extreme suffering.
The fourth stage of the Seven Grievance Stages is Depression, Loneliness and Reflection. This is a period in which the loss is fully assimilated and the person feels the full effects of the loss of a loved one. He or she finds it a battle to wake up each morning, and the classic signs of depression appear, including insomnia, loss of appetite, and hopelessness.
The fifth stage is called The Upward Turn. This is a period when an individual begins to improve and begins to adjust to the loss. Your life becomes a little less stressful and a little more organized. The symptoms of depression begin to disappear and the individual begins to feel a sense of calm.
The sixth stage is called Reconstruction of Life and Elaboration. At this stage, a person begins to rebuild his own life without the presence of a loved one. There is a desire to fix yourself and face the truths of losing him. They begin to realize the promise of the future and begin to release the pain of the past.
The final stage is called Acceptance and Hope. This is a time when the person may not be happy, but the grieving person is able to remember the lost loved one without feeling devastating emotional pain. They are slowly recovering from the pain with a new sense of life and responsibility. They may not go back to the person they were before the loss, but they learn to deal with reality and move on.
These stepping stones are only the beginning in one’s journey to recover from grief. The individual still has a lot to face, but he begins to look to the future and finds happiness in what he has. Again, it is important to note that these seven stages of grieving are not the same for everyone, and each individual may face different challenges within their own personal journey to find joy in life once again.